Finding Strength: My Journey of Healing After the Loss of My Son

I can't count how many times I have heard "Losing a child is a mother’s worst nightmare.", "I can't imagine your pain.", "It is not the natural order for a child to pass before a mother." "There are no words. I'm so sorry." The grief that comes with this loss is something I never imagined I’d face. It’s overwhelming—filled with sadness, shock, guilt, anger, and a sense of being completely lost. It left me wondering how to move forward. The hopes and dreams I had held in my heart for my son since the day I laid eyes on him came to an end. Taken in an accident, on Father's Day, at just twenty-six years young. I thought there were so many chapters left in his his life. Our future had been abruptly rewritten and our memories layered in sadness. The grief was heavy, like an anchor on my heart, pulling me down until I sank to rock bottom. The only way out was up and I needed to find the strength to rise.

I dedicated my days to reaching for that strength. Strength comes from honoring the truth of our feelings, being brave enough to grieve, and focusing on the love inside us, that will never fade. I embrace my emotions and allow myself to grieve, I also find moments of light where his memory shines through... moments in silence when I can hear his laughter, feel his spirit beside me, reminding me that our connection isn’t limited by time or space. When my saddest thoughts surface, I release them in tears and they are followed by a powerful wave of love. A warm and comforting, healing feeling that washes over me and leaves my heart with a strong sense of knowing. A mother's intuition knows her son's love. There is a big difference in feelings that come from you and feelings that come to you. I have peace in knowing that he’s always with me, guiding me, and helping me find the courage to keep going.

Though my life has changed in ways I never expected, my connection with my son remains eternal. Through all of this, I’ve come to understand the love I have for my son remains. It is deep and unwavering. Even though he is no longer physically with me, I feel his presence, his energy, and our unbreakable bond every day. I share this part of my journey in the hopes that it inspires others to embrace their own grief, find peace in their hearts, and know that love is the thread that connects us all. I have come to find that love is the answer to everything.